Inspiraelevation

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Living under the shadow of consistent trauma is no joke. Some people move through their lives carrying with them a load of distress. Before they can get over one trauma, life hits them with another one. Imagine that for some trauma, it takes years to heal. However, days, weeks, or even months later, they are hit with another traumatic event. When I say traumatic events, I mean life-altering events that affect a person on multiple levels.

Traumatic Experiences Run Amok

A back laden with too much weight breaks. A person who is consistently denied nutrient oxygen eventually suffocates.

Many people suffer from repeated traumatic events, and the effects can be crippling, especially without the right resources. According to the USCF Center to Address Trauma-Informed Health Care, “From extensive trauma-related research, it is now recognized that unaddressed trauma is the hidden cause of most preventable illnesses, and is associated with eight of the 10 leading causes of death, including heart, lung and kidney disease, cancer, stroke, diabetes, suicide, and accidental overdose.” So it is surely something which needs addressing.

I, Too

In my life, I am currently experiencing intense trauma. I know that I am dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It’s been one major disruptor after another in my life since 2020. Before I could heal from one thing, another came along. I have been uprooted in every sense of the word. Most people don’t share their stories for whatever reason. But healing can be found in finding a community of people who understand. In addition to sharing my growth experiences, I will also share the lessons I have learned and continue to learn.

Traumatic Responses: Put Your Oxygen Mask on First

When there is an emergency, they advise you to put on your own oxygen mask first. Once you have done so, you can help others. I agree, but sometimes you can’t see the oxygen mask dangling before you. Maybe your oxygen mask has come loose. Sometimes your level of anxiety prevents you from correctly fixing the oxygen mask to your face. So, it’s challenging to find that healing within oneself. And that’s okay. That is why we need each other.

A Shared Experience

As my life has unfolded, I’ve dealt with everything from the death of a family member to the slow decline of relationships, moved, worried about homelessness, and dealt with depression in myself and my children. Throughout my writing this post, I’m still going through a lot of this. I have lost myself, fallen to a point where I couldn’t recognize the people around me or who I was anymore.

Even the person who strives to motivate others often needs motivation. Even I am amid chaos and yet am expected to function as a whole human being, and it is exhausting. I keep trying to keep on keeping on, but it is trying.

Conclusion: You Are Not Alone

I said all that to say is that I am here. The more I learn, the more I work toward growth. And even though I am going through a lot, I am holding on to hope; and I want you to know that you do not need to suffer alone.

There is a multitude of methods and strategies that help one pursue a path to achievement. It’s certainly not one size fits everyone solution.

But no matter what strategy one chooses, it’s a process.

Nothing happens overnight! Yes, some successes seem meteoric. It appears as if they come out of nowhere. However they do not. How do I know?

Well, It would be helpful to consider the process that allows one to see a meteor in the night sky.

Before we ever see the evidence of a meteoroid appearing in the atmosphere as a streak of brilliant light, it has been on a course to its destination. It has been in motion.

The Process: From Asteroid to Meteor

_{Photo by Narsimha Rao Mangu: https://www.pexels.com/photo/starry-sky-with-falling-meteor-10572153/}

National Geographic says,

As asteroids smash into each other, they produce debris—meteoroids. The force of the asteroid collision can throw the meteoroid debris—and sometimes the asteroids—out of their orbit. And this can put the meteoroids on a collision course with a planet or moon.”

https://education.nationalgeographic.org/resource/meteoroid

We see the results once meteoroids crash into our atmosphere.

National Geographic notes,

“When a meteoroid passes through Earth’s atmosphere, it heats up because of air resistance. The heat causes gases around the meteoroid to glow brightly. This glowing meteoroid is a meteor, sometimes nicknamed a “shooting star.”

https://education.nationalgeographic.org/resource/meteoroid

With the same notion, we look at our dreams and goals. Merely because we do not see something happen with immediacy does not mean it’s not on the way.

The Achievement Process

_{Photo by Guille Álvarez on Unsplash}

The start is often challenging; of that, there is no lie. However, starting is essential.

Maintaining consistency is even more onerous, but it’s necessary.

However, one of the hardest things is believing and trusting that your actions will pay off.

It’s hard to plant seeds in the ground, both needing and wanting a harvest, yet having to patiently wait until the seed sprouts, grows, and is ripe for the picking. Unfortunately, the only thing within your power is the planting and the watering. You cannot force it to happen. It will happen when it happens.

 A Personal Share

_{Photo by Pixabay: https://www.pexels.com/photo/gray-scale-photo-of-a-pregnant-woman-46207/}

I remember my pregnancies fondly. I was full of expectancy, wanting to know what my babies would look like and how life would be once blessed with their presence. Yet no matter how expectant or excited I was for the delivery, the timing of their birthing wasn’t in my hands.

I was dilated for quite some time with one of my pregnancies, but nothing happened until my son was ready to come into the world. At another delivery, I was told to walk, bounce on a ball, and do whatever I could to catalyze labor. But still, my baby came when it was ready to be born.

Learn to Trust the Process

When we commit to a process to accomplish a goal, we have to learn to trust the process. We have to move as if what we desire is right around the corner. Trust that our efforts will pay off. But that all starts and ends in the mind.

A Word of Encouragement

_{Photo by Charl Durand: https://www.pexels.com/photo/black-and-white-photo-of-a-sprayed-script-on-a-pavement-6486185/}

So today, I encourage you! If you are in the process of waiting, keep holding out. If you have planted and watered, trust it’s on the way. If you have conceived, trust and believe that what you are pregnant with will be delivered. In the words of Joel Olsteen, you can’t deliver what you haven’t conceived.” But if you have conceived it, you can be sure you will birth it.

When it is fully grown. It will be born at the appointed time, not your designated time.

So hold on, keep pushing, and trust the process.

Anaïs Nin said we don’t see the world as it is but as we are.

But what shapes who we are?

Over time how we believe is formed from the dust gathered from our experiences. And that paints how we see the world.

How Does Our Perception of the World Affect Our Reality?

When considering how one reaches a state of fulfillment, success, or happiness, one must realize that it’s not external. These concepts are a matter of perception based on the internal.

If there is no sense of contentment in our internal world, we will be unable to manifest fulfillment, feel truly successful or be happy in the external world. The lives we live are reflections. What is on the inside eventually leaks out.

Where does happiness come from?

Happiness comes from alignment.

Howard Falco writes in his book “The Power of Discovering Who You Really Are.” “If reality validates our beliefs, we feel peaceful or positive. If reality invalidates or conflicts with our beliefs, we feel negative.”

He continues, “When we can’t validate what we believe to be true, we tend to feel confused, upset, or out of harmony.”

And so the key is in how we shape our beliefs.

Developing Beliefs (Building our Mainframe)

What we believe is a construct. It’s developed from the information we have received and the confirmation or non-confirmation of those ideas we have been taught.

If an idea is confirmed, it becomes a truth to us. It becomes like a rule or a standard of practice. These standards give meaning, providing us with a reference point. So, when we have future experiences, we hold them up to that reference point. And then, our mind works to filter out those things we have been programmed to believe are unnecessary and re-train focus on what we have come to define as pertinent.

Fundamentally we are all biased beings Because our knowledge is incomplete. We don’t know what we don’t know.  So, our databases are corrupted. And if our databases are corrupted, our mainframe doesn’t work properly. So, our filters are broken by default. And as a result, we misinterpret and misread situations.

 Many people, I included, sometimes move in and out of a state of unfulfillment because our expectations are built on faulty premises.

An Example:

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For example: If growing up, every time I did something good, I was rewarded with a gift. I would eventually equate receiving a gift with acceptance and being loved.  If this happened repeatedly, it would become the standard by which I judged whether I was loved or not in other circumstances.

On the contrary, if I were denied things when I made a mistake or didn’t do as well, it would serve to confirm what I began to believe as true. That is, love means receiving that is stored in my mental mainframe

Measuring the Present Using a Limited Database (Corrupted Mainframe)

when seeking love or determining if someone loves me, by default, I hold that experience up to that rule book. On the occasion when I would not receive something from the one I loved on a special day, whether it would be a comment or gift, it would set off triggers. My programming would tell me that I was unloved.

But that is not necessarily true.

People love differently.

But until I reprogram my database, I will continue to be disappointed.

So, I must change my definition to open myself up to receive love in the way others can give it.  Then I will experience fulfillment, happiness, or success in love.

Final Summation

Fulfillment comes from wiping the mainframe. That means starting all over, unlearning what I have learned, and gaining new knowledge, thereby taking the limitations off of my beliefs. Because as James Allen penned “As a Man Thinketh.”

The New Year has begun, and it’s a blessing to say we crossed the threshold. There are so many who didn’t make it. Some left this world due to heavy hearts. They were bowed and broken by the world’s weight and unable to face a new day. And others closed their eyes in eternal slumber. No matter the reason, they are not here today. That says something for those of us still breathing. We still have a purpose. We still have things that need to be done, and if we can hold on, we can see the fruits of our endurance.

Heart to Hearts

I have conveyed in many of my written messages that there is always a lesson. There is something to learn every day. Some insights we gain might be small or what may seem like useless bits of knowledge. While others have greater applicability and can improve our lives if we take heed. But there is always something to learn. We grow daily in ways unseen.

A Lesson for the New Year

The year didn’t pass before teaching me a precious lesson.

 That lesson is the importance of clarity or, more specifically, clarified intention. Be specific when you set your intention and attempt to go about the process of manifesting your desires. This gentle word may seem trite to some, but it’s not.

Be careful what you wish for: The Importance of Clarifying Your Intentions.

I never took stock of the adage, “Be careful what you wish for because you might get it.” I was more caught up in finally getting something I asked for. But now I fully understand the weightiness of that adage.

Why is it important to be careful?

Sometimes there is a mismatch between what we want and desire because things are more appealing in theory. Other times we don’t know what it is that we want. There’s a general idea, but it’s fundamentally unclear. And then, other times, we know, but we don’t understand how to break it down into specific desires. So, I urge anyone who reads this to stop and take stock before voicing (putting out into the universe) what you think you want. Make sure it’s specific.

The Real Deal

Let me give you a few examples of what I mean. Let’s look at the real deal.

Some believe they want to be famous until they are. There is a lot that comes with fame. And it certainly is not all glitz and glamour. It’s often unpretty, cumbersome, and a beast to maintain. Some say they want to be rich without taking stock of how that could occur. Sometimes there is a cost, and that cost may be very steep. However, for most, the impact of fulfillment is rarely considered in the ask. But I would be amiss if I didn’t pass on what I have learned.

One Final Imperative on Clarified Intention

The truth is that many will only realize the imperative nature of being specific once they get what they presume they want. It is then that they realize they want so much more. Or rather, they don’t want what they believed they desired in the form in which it is received. I found that out before the passing of the old year. But it was a lesson well learned and one that has, without a doubt, changed my life. And I hope it will change yours as well.

When setting your intentions for this year, be mindful. When seeking to manifest, be clear. Because sometimes, there are no takebacks.

Intention

There is a word that is an essential building block of success. That word is Intention. Everything that one succeeds at begins with intention. Intention is pointed direction. It is a driving force.

Intention is motive.

The biggest tool for advancement and discernment (empowerment) is seeking out intention in yourself and others.

Not only is intention the starting marker for putting in your best it is also a ruler by which you can measure others. Understanding the intention of others will provide all the information needed for pruning relationships.

There is a saying repeated often, and it bears repeating that we rise to the level of those with whom we surround ourselves. So, if you want a good measure of where you are going, look at those you choose to hold council with.

Blind Cannot Lead the Blind.

A person with an impoverished mind cannot show you how to be wealthy. A person who isn’t a parent can’t tell you how to be a parent. Someone who has never been married can’t counsel on how to develop a deep and abiding marriage.

However, If you find yourself in a circle of people who are your equals in aspiration or have reached a level to which you aspire, then the next measure is to search out their intention.

Inequality of Intentions

Not all intentions are equal. Two people can desire the same outcome but for entirely different reasons. For example, one might desire to be rich to give back, while another may want to be rich as a means of revenge. Their sole purpose is to push their success in the face of others.

Some may want to get to know you because they are interested in developing a genuine friendship. Others have designs on you. There is an underlying motive, possibly exploitation or harm.

Always ask why?

Before you undertake something, ask yourself, why am I doing this?

Before accepting anyone into your circle, examine why you want them in your circle. And if someone approaches you with a desire to connect, ask yourself why?

When we discover our intention and the intention of others, we save ourselves a lot of pain.

What I Learned

Nine times out of ten, I have discovered when something doesn’t work out for me, it’s because it was driven by the wrong motive. When I am most let down, I look for the wrong things. My intentions are not pure.

This self-examination is not something that comes easily. It is easy to fall back into negative patterns. But it’s worth changing those habits. When changing your habits, you change your life.