Category: Uncategorized

Comparing

October 30th, 2015
One of the most detrimental things to one’s success, achievement, and happiness in life is comparing oneself to another.

It is willfully admitting that you are not enough. It is an admittance that there is something wrong with you, a fallacy that if embraced will destroy as it eats the individual from the inside out.

This cankerous belief system will erode one’s spirit, confidence, energy, and desire to progress and thrive.

In turn, it rob’s the world of the unborn potential and the greatness that was built inside of you.

We are all meant to succeed

Everyone wants to be somebody.

We all want to achieve, to do something brilliant with our lives.

Everyone should because it is our birthright.

Brilliance occurs along a spectrum, a broad concept that covers varied fields.

Just as every star has its purpose, illuminates its corner of the sky, an area that would be entrenched in darkness without its light no matter how bright. Such is the same for every individual born into this world.

We are born to progress, to reach, and to grow.

We are born to do?

Thus, we are born to achieve and succeed not merely to thrive.

Why comparing is counterintuitive to achieving excellence
1. Success is not formulaic. Success was always meant to be fluid, varied, and self-defined.
Success is not one size fits all.

There is not one precise definition of what success looks like.

It should not be. It was never meant to be as such.

Just as nature is diverse in its beauty and each component unique, just as the wind, the river, the land, and the trees, so are we meant to be.

We are a reflection of nature.

A tree was never meant to be a flower.

A rose never meant to be a buttercup.

The sun and moon were created with their own majestic glory and their own roles to carry out.

With the same token, we are meant to find our own successes.

We are meant to achieve our individual purpose not that of someone else’s.

Comparison is the death knell of all success.

2. We are all working from different blueprints.

We cannot effectively compare our gifts to that of others.

We all were handed a different set of tools in our toolbox when we entered this world.

You can’t build a bridge if you were born with the talents and the ability to work wonders with a knife, a fork, and a spoon.

Those who continue to try to build a bridge when not equipped with such tools will always live a bitter life. They will never have what is necessary to succeed.

Sadly a lot have succumbed to this.

Many are not meeting their potential because they are busy trying to be the next Obama, King, Jordan, Tiger Woods, Beyonce, Pharell, Diana Ross, Einstein, Edison etc…

The fact is, they will never be the next version of these individuals because they were not born a doppelganger or with identical genetic blueprints. Their gift signature is different.

Success is the result of trying to be the best you.

3. We will never live up to someone else’s achievements and success.

There will never be another you, who was put here to do what only you can do, at the level that you can do it at.

We are all originals.

Additionally, it is impossible to compare our life’s circumstances to that of others.

Our journeys or our personal sagas are our own and our success result from our own personal experiences. Thus, our victories will be different.

4. We are all on different legs of this journey called life.

We cannot and should not compare the stage of our journey to another’s.

Instead

If we wish to be successful we must always look at ourselves and try to be better today than we were yesterday.

We must excel and break our individual boundaries and limits and be confident in our abilities, efforts, and outcomes.

Aspiring to be you and great at what you can do is what sets you up to be the G.O.A.T at what you were purposed to do.
the key to empathy is connection

October 24th, 2015

We must strive to connect.

Connectivity is the foundational principle upon which humanity; brotherhood/sisterhood rests.

of such is constructed indestructible bonds, comprised of an obscure glue holding everyone and everything in unity, miring us in togetherness.

When we find those things which bridge us, laying open our vulnerabilities and humanness, that is when our bonds solidify. The point, where the indomitable human spirit is most evident.

We must remember that everyone has an untold story.

In each person, there is a song yet song, a novel yet to be written. Inside each one of us, there are accounts of pain, joy, struggle, victory, of life, things we all identify with.

These are the things that make us human, our experiences.

These are our points of connection.

It is the sharing of such that links us.

We must take the time to listen, not just hear.

It is through listening that we unfurl our spirits and open our souls.

We remove our armor and defenses and permit ourselves to feel the experience of others, without judgment, with unfeigned acceptance and understanding.

We must seek to do more of this. This is where the healing of humanity and our success journey as a collective begins.

This calls for more than a surface understanding.

Deep understanding is the root of compassion and empathy

On the surface lies all vanity.

Vanity is shallow and fleeting.

Nothing solid can be built upon vanity as vanity creates mirages and disillusions

It is hard to form attachments to mirages and disillusionment, as these things are insubstantial and alien.

It is difficult to care for that or those with whom there is no attachment.

Those people and things wherein there is no connection, it is easy to dehumanize to abuse, or to destroy because they are not kindred to you. You cannot feel their pain or sympathize with their suffering.

To cause harm or desire the destruction of others like you, is to wish and inflict the same upon yourself.

Thus, the basis of compassion and empathy is finding a link; finding yourself in others.

Compassion and empathy begin with connectivity.

Let’s begin the healing and progress forward today, connect with someone on a deeper level, listen to their story let yourself fill the extent of their experience.
How are you measuring life?

October 17th, 2015

Life is what you make it.

How you define the meaning of life is left for you to pen.

No matter what, you make life all that it is ,or all that it is not.

Some let others define the meaning of life while others live within the parameters that other set.

Then there are those who are not afraid to define and live life and harness all their creative power in their today’s’ to create their own unique and beautiful existence.

We all have been given this gift wrapped in endless strings of sunrises and sunsets.

Within that gift raw materials and resources to create something beautiful.

As a bonus creative ingenuity, and free will.

Each one equipped with tools unique and varied.

If used, to develop experience richly unique and beautiful.

You are the craftsman that must make something out of what you are given.

You can look at the clay and see embossed within, the statue of David, and use every drop of your time and talent and carve out brilliance

You can look at the clay and just see dirt; lament, moan, and hope that something will become of the clay that you have inherited.

You are in complete control and no one is responsible for the myriad of outcomes you experience but you.

Success begins with inquiry.

You must inquire of yourself often what am I doing?

Is life what I want it to be?

Am I living my best life, why or why not?

If not ask yourself these questions?

Is every day an exercise in seeking sunsets.

Am I counting the minutes until work ends?

Am I just waiting for the weekend, holiday, or for my next vacation?

Are your today’s full of hopes, idled behavior, musings forward, always hoping for resplendent dawns, yet, with no plans or changes of habits in your today’s to make it happen.

Is your every day an exercise in counting sunrises.

Are you mesmerized by today, a start, a renewal of purpose and opportunity?

Are you eager to meet the rising sun?

Do you anxiously cast of the nightscape so that you can meet the morning sun with expectation?

Do you desire to push back the horizon and impede the setting sun to squeeze the last bit of time out of today?

If you are not where you want to be or desire to be, ask yourself if you are counting sunrises or sunsets?

Are you looking forward but failing to live today?

Remember that no one can ever behold the tomorrow they desire without fully investing in their today.

Count your sunsets and use them to the fullest you will be surprised what masterpiece your life will become just like that of Michaleangelo.

At 87 Michaelangelo had this bit of wisdom to share with us.
Check your privilege

October 15th, 2015

Some topics have become taboo or unapproachable, as the mere mention brings up feelings of discomfort and for some inspires great ire.

One must tread lightly with both tongue and sentiment upon broaching such subject matters as the causative impact is likely to be caustic, leaving one to feel leperous, an outcast amongst others.

This stems from the lack of understanding.

Perhaps the ire is rooted in a great an unsettling fear of the revelation of ugly truths, which darken our sensibilities and awakens wrath at the mention of weighted words heavy with implications.

Perhaps we fear to fully know ourselves, to find our core uncovered, to be vulnerable before the eyes of all.

Perhaps we writhe within our inner man when deemed as unjust, and looked upon with scrutiny.

We love spotlights but hate microscopes.

However, In all one’s getting, one must get a clear understanding.

Therefore, such subjects must be broached despite its painful and climatic implications.

Privilege

Privilege has become a dirty word to some, one where many attach great animosity.

Whereas, to be deemed privilege is to cast one as haughty and exclusionary.

This can be a truth, but it is not the complete truth.

Being privileged is not synonymous with haughtiness.

Many are in fact born privileged, even the ones who deny they are because their myopic vision only permits them to see their burdens.

Many are born with certain accouterments that others around the globe are not privy to. In this regard, by birth, or naturalization they have become privileged.

It is not privilege itself that creates animosity or furor, rather it is what one does with the privileges that have been bestowed upon him or her.

Misuse, abuse, or unawareness, of privilege is often a companion to egotism and pride.

This is often demonstrated by a firm stance on merit, as such hold to merit as a basis for their progression or success. Yet, fail to see the role that favor and grace play in their ascension or accomplishment. Thus, giving those a false sense of superiority or faux importance.

Such thinking forms strongholds, which contribute to prejudiced thinking and linked behaviors often demonstrated through the denial of opportunities for others, biased thinking, labeling, and more. The underlying subtext being “I have obtained because I have earned or deserved”.

The truth is most of what we have attained we have been given. Although, we work to obtain them our work does not guarantee us anything. Another man’s heart must be turned for an opportunity to be given.

Those who deny such are detached. This detachment is often followed by feelings of animosity, spite, ire, due to feelings of pressure the weight of feeling attacked. As a result many become deaf, unfeeling, and unempathetic.

To admit so would force many to admit that the condition of their success does not fully rest on their ingenuity, talents, skill, work ethic or brilliance, but that it is very dependent on benevolence, inequality, nepotism, bias, chance, and favor.

Privilege is no more than unsolicited favor. or as Webster’s dictionary defines it ” a right or immunity granted as a peculiar benefit, advantage, or favor.”

To be privileged is not a curse among men, it is a blessing and not to be disavowed.

There is nothing wrong with being privileged or accepting privilege.

Such a gift comes about by various means.

Some are privileged due to their family, their relationships, their intelligence, their looks, their skill, their artistry, their citizenship, affiliations, their gender, nationality and yes their ethnicity.

Privilege is certainly not bound to a select few, it is shared by many in varying capacities, in varying environments, and in different spaces of time.

Thus, such should not invoke feelings of shame.

One cannot choose to whom they are born, where they are born, the skin they are born in, or how they are gifted.

These things result from measures beyond ones control.

It is simply a gift.

By means of those gifts come privileges not extended to all.

In the end, although one has been graced with unmerited favor, by whatever means, it does not in turn merit one’s haughtiness or justify an oppressive nature.

Privilege exists for a purpose and not to wield it as a tool of oppression.

Recognizing my privilege

It took me a bit of time to realize my privilege.

All I could see was my state of lack, and the privilege that others were afforded that I was not.

I never took a look at the privileges I had been granted over others.

However, I have been permitted the opportunity of sight.

I have been permitted an opportunity to see the extension of unmerited favor to me, surely not deserved but extended to me.

As I sit in that privilege I sit humbled, not overexuberant, not haughty, but empathetic and full of gratitude.

I understand that to whom much is given much is expected.

I use that privilege to fuel compassion, benevolence, and servitude to those not afforded those opportunities as “I” have, due to circumstances beyond their control.

I believe that this is why privilege exists.

Not that we deem ourselves to be of undue importance, but that we see the contrasts in life and we do something to equalize and stabilize rather than oppress.

It is the duty of those that have, to see the contrasts between disparity and affluence.

Recognize that we are our brothers keepers. As separate individual’s the world is unequal, unfair, and imbalanced.

There is much in this world that is imperfect.

Together we hold the keys to restorative balance.

The strong are to bear the infirmities of the weak

Those who have, extend to those who have not

Those to whom much given to give of their abundance

We the beneficiaries are to use our gifts, and our privilege to benefit others
The unexpected

September 18th, 2015

Always be ready.

Always be prepared.

Be careful that you do not turn your dream away because it comes in unexpected packaging.

There are many praying, desiring, and preparing for something.

Yet, it seems like their ship never comes into harbor.

So they wait anxiously on the dock searching the horizon.

While they are waiting, they sometimes pass up the dinghy, the row boat, the motor boat, the canoe, or maybe even the yacht because they are waiting for the ocean liner.

Not for one moment do they ever stop to think that maybe that the dinghy, row-boat, motor boat, canoe, or the yacht was the answer to all they were ever looking for.

That ocean liner never comes.

Day after day, they are passing up on their dreams because they are looking to rule the kingdoms of the world without ever learning to be stewards, love, appreciate, and grow all that they now see.

One has to learn that sometimes what we need is not what we want.

What one is looking for is not the thing that will bless them and lend to the exponential success they are looking for.

Sometimes you have to give up looking for a little while.

Never be too big to reject that which seems too small for the bigness of your dreams.

The most beautiful and exotic flowers start off as plain seeds.

One has to plant a seed before one can expect a tree.

So it follows that a forest never comes about without first planting a seed.

This is a lesson that has been taught for many centuries but yet still only grasped by the few.

When you appreciate what you are given, what you see and turn what you have into something beautiful your dreams will always be in reach.

You will draw everything to you that you will ever need.

Be careful of what you say you will not do?

Be careful of rejecting things because they appear to be beneath you?

Some things and some people are sent into your life to humble you.

Remember,

Diamonds begin as lumps of coal.

Cities start off as piles of brick or cement.

Even you were once a gleam in your mother’s eye a simple cell without your current complex form.

Yet you are here.

For that to happen someone had to accept and cherish that which you were so you could grow to be that which you are.

Be expectant

Be vigilant

Be ready