Mistakes are very much a part of life. We all make them, some big and some small. And let’s face it, some of the mistakes we make can have enormous consequences. So, it’s not outside of the norm to experience fear behind a mistake. 

Fear is a catalyst for inquiry. 

A string of questions typically follows mistakes. What’s next? What am I going to do? or How do I fix it?

That is often followed by a long period of indecisiveness, guilt, panic, and even shame. Then, finally, it can become a downward spiral unless something is done.

After a mistake, what’s next? 

There is no definitive answer. All actions have consequences. Some are good, and some not so much. Some prices we pay immediately, and other times the bill comes due down the road. 

There are times when we pick up the bill, and sometimes others do. There is no way to know what comes next. 

Altering the future can only be done by acting in the present. However, this is a question many let arrest their movement. One must take up the courage to face what is and work to improve (see it as a lesson)

“Wisdom comes from making mistakes, having the courage to face them, and make adjustments moving forward based upon the knowledge aquired through those experiences.”
― Ken Poirot

What am I going to do? 

There is only one thing to do. Get up. Dust yourself off and keep moving. Tomorrow will come whether one likes it or not. The past always turns into now. And it ultimately causes more pain to try to stay in a place that is no longer. You die a thousand deaths that way because only ghosts occupy the past. And ghosts have no real communion with the living. 

How do I fix it, my mistake? 

You can mend it. 

You can fill in the cracks.

However, one can’t erase the past. It’s impossible to rewind time. Once said, a word has crippling power, and a bullet that has left the chamber finds its target.

And unfortunately,  once the milk is spilled, as the adage goes, “there is no use in crying.”

What’s done is done! 

So, the work is in rebuilding and restoring.

It is in building up the character to do better. 

The truth is the only way to move on from a mistake is to learn from it. 

So, glean wisdom and let it make you a better person. 

When we become more conscientious, slow down, and think first, we are less apt to make mistakes. Our decisions become deliberate. Our choices will be based on the now, not the past or a future that has yet to arrive. 

Real-life Example

My baby boy wanted slime. So in a desire to make my baby boy happy, my mind went to work on how I could surprise him with this slime. I had no forethought of the results of buying that slime. So I was hurried in my action; I was driven by emotion. I was not conscientious. My response was driven by past and future emotionalism. I wanted to give him more of what I felt I didn’t have growing up. And I anticipated a specific reaction.

I did get the reaction? He loves that slime.

After getting it, my oldest son said, “Mom, I think that might have been a mistake.” And I contended no. I said, “Why?” He said because “Mom he’s going to have that everywhere.” Again, I said no, outright denying my mistake at the time. “I said, I told him to keep on the table.”

My Mistake

I must admit my baby boy kept the slime on the table. However, I didn’t contend how hard it would be to get the slime off the table after each use. After having a major cleaning session to get the slime off the table for two days, I finally admitted okay; I had made a mistake.

But I couldn’t take it back. I couldn’t take it away from my baby boy. So, I had to come up with an alternative. No reaction would change the choice made or the consequences that followed. To progress, I had no choice but to learn from my mistake and find something that worked now. Otherwise, I would be locked in a loop of useless emotion. The consequence would continue until I learned. 

I found a tray for him to play with the slime on, and I’m happy. He still gets to play with his slime. I have less of a mess to contend with. 

After action Review

Some may say that should have been the first thought. Perhaps but it wasn’t. I acted before thinking about it. I make mistakes, and no apologies need to be made for being human. Sometimes my emotions get the best of me. I admit I’m imperfect.

“One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. Perfection simply doesn’t exist…..Without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist”
― Stephen Hawking

I also know that making mistakes is a part of life. And I’m learning how to learn. I’m learning to make better decisions.

So as for the slime, now I know what not to do again. Will that information be helpful to me in the future? Perhaps it will, or maybe it will not? Or maybe it’s something I learned to pass on to someone else. Whatever the reason doesn’t matter. What matter is that I grew from that experience. 

I hope you will learn that there is no shame in making mistakes. The important thing is that when you make a mistake, you grow from them no matter how small they may be.